View Point - Neil O. Nelson

The St. Louis-area community wants to ban swearing in bars, along with table-dancing, drinking contests and profane music, all of which are elements that lead to rowdy behavior.

“We’re mad as . . . heck, and we’re not going to take it any more.”

That said, the St. Charles City Councilman who introduced the bill is catching some heat.  Keep reading →

Hardly a day goes by these days without someone breaking a contract to take another job.

I don’t get it.

Why offer a contract — make a big deal out of it, including photo opps for the TV and print guys, smiling all the while — when the guy you want on your team will more than likely jump ship after a couple of years?

“What happened to the 5-year contract we signed?”  Keep reading →

The bank clock reads -10º.

The newspaper is forecasting 20 below for tomorrow night.

I huddle closer to my little heater and swear I can feel the wind blow through the walls of my 100-year-old office cubicle.

Ah, winter.  Keep reading →

These men and their machines.

In the spring, summer and fall, they’re in their yard pushing, trailing  or riding lawnmowers.

In the winter, they’re pushing, blowing or rearranging the snow.

Matters little if it snows one inch or 12 inches, they’re out there.

You hear them at all hours; the whine of the snowblower engine is not to be mistaken for that of a cold car, for instance, or the lawnmower or leaf blower, which would answer the call to duty, if it wasn’t freezing out there.

Actually, the leaf blower, I understand, is sometimes used in snow removal operations. What better piece of equipment is there when clearing snow from tight corners?

But, when it comes to winter’s big jobs: the driveway, the neighbor’s driveway, the church and school parking lots, the in-laws’ driveway, your beer-drinking buddy’s street, the BAR’s parking lot, the kids’ backyard skating rink, Main Street, the highway out of town, it’s you and your snowblower. Keep reading →

Political analyst Pat Buchanan contends the ship is sinking.

We’re heading toward the perfect storm, Buchanan is telling anyone and everyone who will listen.

Manufacturing and jobs are going overseas, the dollar is sinking and our borders are so porous the Holiday Inn is considering building where the water is low on the Rio Grande.

Plus, popularity polls for the president and Congress are at record lows.  Keep reading →

“Geese and ducks! Where are the turkeys?”

What do you mean I have to shoot my own?

Pilgrims, today, would be amazed at all the turkeys. They’re everywhere . . .

In the spirit of the season, this being Thanksgiving, my 2007 Turkey Parade sports some new faces, some old and tired names and some surprises.  Keep reading →

…the students studying journalism looked at me sideways when I told them what to expect if they entered the world of print journalism — newspapers, in other words; weekly papers, to be specific.

“You don’t get sick and you don’t take vacations.”

I’m not done, I intoned. You have a deadline to meet every week. You’ll work nights, attend countless meetings and you’ll be expected to be at every — I repeat, every — sporting event in your community.

If your wife is pregnant, tell her to have the baby on the weekend. Otherwise, she’s on her own.  Keep reading →

A bleeding heart, for sure.
But, when it comes to moving mountains, Ellen DeGeneres is your man. Check that, she’s the person you want on your side, pleading your case, not necessarily crying in your beer, but crying all the same.
When women cry, people take action.
When they cry on live television, the reaction is immediate, intense and immense.
When Ellen tears up, people glued to their televisions are on the move within the hour, in cyberspace with their computer or calling cross-country on their cell phones. Many are seen racing out their front doors, screaming, “Ellen needs us. Now.” Keep reading →

Wherever you look, there’s a train wreck waiting to happen.
From Hollywood and Britney Spears to Washington and George W, from professional football and the hapless Minnesota Vikings to Major League Baseball and the Minnesota Twins, our claim to the Comedy Central’s best act, to the presidential races in both parties, the trains are leaving the station.
I think I’m going to pass.
I don’t care any more.
But I don’t care any less, truth be told.
So, being the hypocrite that I am, count me in with the crowd at the train station waiting for the next train wreck to happen. Keep reading →

…but challenging, just the same. Grab your No. 2 pencil and have at it.

q Too Tall Tom Szymanski has been shown the door. However, the question remains: Why was the highly-visible and popular TV weatherman dismissed?
A) The recently lowered ceiling in the TV studios couldn’t accommodate his 6-10 frame.
B) He was too popular.
C) His simple daily quiz was embarrassing the news team.
D) Corporate greed. Keep reading →